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Personal Development Self Growth

Improve your self esteem part 1

Your self-esteem is probably the most important part of your personality. “Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope or confidence” ~ Helen Keller. It is the energy source or the reactor core of your personality, and how much self-esteem you have determines your levels of vitality, enthusiasm and personal magnetism. I have noticed that people with a high self-esteem are more positive, more likable and more effective in every part of their lives.

Everything that you do or say or think affects your self-esteem. It is important therefore, that you guard your self esteem jealously by having the right frame of mind on a continuous basis. Probably the best definition of self-esteem is “the level to which you respect and value yourself as an important, worthwhile person”. How much value to do you put on yourself? The value will usually be determined by the kind of life you lead. It is your level of mental fitness.

 To be at your best and feel terrific about yourself, you should be in a perpetual state of self-esteem building and maintenance. Just as you take responsibility for your level of physical fitness, you need to take complete responsibility for the content and quality of your mind.

I have developed a simple formula that contains all the critical elements of self-esteem building, and you can use it on a regular basis to ensure maximum performance. This formula is comprised of six basic elements. They are: goals, principles, success experiences, comparison with others, recognition, and rewards.

Goals

“Goals allow you to control the direction of change in your favor”. How much you like and respect yourself is directly affected by your goals. The very act of setting big, challenging goals for yourself and making written plans of action to achieve them actually raises your self-esteem, which causes you to feel much better about yourself. It is important to set goals for your life. Imagine how nice it would be like to play a video of your life and you being the main character achieving your goals one at a time.

Self-esteem is a condition you experience when you are moving step-by-step toward the accomplishment of something that is important to you. For that reason, it’s really important to have clear goals for each part of your life and to continually work toward achieving those goals. Each progressive step causes your self-esteem to go up and makes you feel even more positive and effective in everything else you do.

Principles

The second element in self-esteem building is having clear principle and values to which you are committed. I think that we all or rather a normal thinking person has their own set principles. These I believe are the driving force of each and every one of us. The difference is the level of commitment. Men and women with high self-esteem are very clear about what they believe in. The higher your values and ideals are, and the more committed you are to living your life consistent with those values and ideals, the more you will like and respect yourself, and the higher your self-esteem will be.

Lasting self-esteem comes only when your goals and your values are congruent-that is, when they fit into each other like a hand into a glove. Much of the stress that people experience comes from believing one thing and trying to do another. But when your goals and values are in harmony with each other, you feel a wonderful surge of energy and well-being, and that’s when you start to make real progress.

Success experiences

“My definition of success is to live your life in a way that causes you to feel a ton of pleasure and very little pain – and because of your lifestyle, have the people around you feel a lot more pleasure than they do pain” ~ Tony Robins. The third element in self-esteem improvement involves having success experiences. Once you have set your goals and principles, it is important that you make them measurable so that you can keep score of your small and large successes along the way. The very act of setting up a goal, breaking it down into smaller parts, and then completing those parts makes you feel like a winner and causes your self-esteem to go up. But remember that you can’t hit a target you can’t see. You can’t feel like a winner unless you clearly lay out the standards by which you are going to measure your success and then achieve those standards.

Let’s say that you set a goal to sell a certain amount or earn a certain amount of income in a given year. If you break that down into monthly and weekly goals, and then you achieve the first of those goals, you will feel great about yourself. Each time you reach another milestone, your self-esteem and ability to perform will increase, and you will feel encouraged and enthusiastic about the next challenge. The key is to keep encouraging yourself with tangible results. The more tangible results you can see the more self esteem you buildup.

Conclusion

This is a two part article and I thought to end here. In the final article am talking about the remaining elements that is comparison with others; recognition and rewards. There is more you could do to improve your self esteem. Having a high self esteem is the gateway to a better life and living. It does not matter what you are or what you have when you put on a high self esteem you can move mountains. Until next time “standout tall and be counted”.

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Categories
Leadership Motivational Personal Development

5 Qualities of leaders and motivators part 1

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader” – John Quincy Adams. This is a two part series in which I am illustrating the 5 qualities of leadership and motivation. We are all born with leadership qualities regardless of our situation the difference is how much of it, do we show the world. I thought to talk about these just so as to remind us about our leadership qualities. You may not be in a leadership position but you are the leader of yourself. If you are a parent like me then you are responsible for providing leadership to your family. Men and women are leaders and bot posses almost the same leadership qualities. Find herewith, the five qualities of leaders and motivators.

Vision
The first quality is vision. I have never come across great leader without vision. All great leaders have a vision. Perhaps vision is the single most quality that, more than anything else separates great leaders from average leaders.  The more vision you have the more likely you are to succeed. “All successful men and women are big dreamers. They imagine what their future could be, ideal in every respect, and then they work every day toward their distant vision, that goal or purpose”. ~ Brian Tracy. A good leader does not get caught up in the day to day activities this is the work for his followers. The Bible says “where there is no vision the people perish” ~ Proverbs.

But remember that we are all born with this quality called vision. If you focus in your area of interest it does not matter what area is, you will be a great leader in that respect. “Cherish your visions and your dreams, as they are the children of your soul; the blueprints of your ultimate achievements” ~ Napoleon Hill.

The best way to motivate others is to firstly motivate yourself. I have attended some personal development workshops and the first thing that strikes me is the level of motivation by the speakers. Believe me if you yourself are not motivated and are trying to motivate others it will show. Example you cannot talk to people about how to make money when you do not have the money to show for it. You must at least show some potential for earning the money or demonstrate that you are actually earning the money. I sometimes come across adverts in the streets, about how someone will give you some lucky charms for getting rich when they themselves are living in poverty.

One of the most powerful tools for all motivators is the commitment to excellence. The best motivational vision you can have for yourself and others is to strive to be the best. Be in business or in whatever area of leadership you are be the best. If you are not the best strive to be among the best at least standout.

Courage
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged” ~ The Bible. The second quality of a leader is courage and is the distinguishing characteristic of a true leader. You can often see it in a leader’s words and action.  A true leader speaks with courage and boldness. It is always easy to set a vision and standards for yourself. But it takes a lot of courage and humility to abiding to your aspirations. We all have what we want to be in life or rather achieve. At least I have formulated my life’s purpose and moving towards achieving it. The distinguishing factor is having the courage to make certain unpleasant decisions that will help us in the long run. When you set certain standards for yourself trust me temptations will come your way so as you compromise with your standards and this is when your show your courage by resisting them.

Remember when I said that we are all born with these qualities? It is the level of growth that differentiates leaders from followers. I believe that all growth is from inside. And that what we are, is as a result of what has developed from the inside.

The foundation of character is the combination of courage and integrity. The first form of courage is your ability to stick to your principles, to stand for what you believe in and to refuse to budge unless you feel right about the alternative. Courage is also the ability to step out in faith, to launch out into the unknown and then to face the inevitable doubt and uncertainty that accompany every new venture.

I give the example of Alexander the great, the king of Macedonia. He became king at the age of 19 and managed to conquer great nations with mightier armies than he had at the time. Simply because he refused to remain at home when his soldiers went to battle instead he was the first one to charge at the war front. He lead by example by letting his men know that he believed in the outcome of every war or battle they fought and that motivated the soldiers to do even more.

Conclusion
For now I end here. In the next series I will mention the remaining three qualities of leaders and motivators that is integrity; realism and responsibility. “You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore” remember to always “standout tall and be counted”.

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Categories
Personal Development Self Growth

Inspiration leads to success part 1

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present” – Unkonwn

This is a two part article in which I write about inspiration and how it leads to success. “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired and success achieved” ~ Hellen Keller. Achieving success cannot be done in isolation. Success is preceded by inspiration. Inspiration can successfully lead one through a voyage of happiness, hope and complete sense of one’s individuality. The absence of inspiration will result to exactly the opposite.

When inspired there is a feeling of enthusiasm. The question that arises most is, where does your inspiration come from? We all have our own answers to this. For me the sources of inspiration are many. One of the major sources is reading and applying the principles of the Bible. The other sources are the targets I have set for myself that is writing motivational blogs for people and helping the less privileged in society. I get motivated and even more inspired when I receive a compliment about an article I wrote or when I see someone I helped getting the most out their life. In other words I get inspired by helping people and seeing them benefit from my help.

It is important to know what inspires you before you set off on your journey to success. Remember success is not a destination but a journey. I like the definition of success by Booker T. Washington “success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life but, by the obstacles he has overcome while trying to succeed”. We are all inspired differently. Where some find inspiration from, those that have attained a certain level of success and happiness in their lives do not; still others are inspired by nature and its wonders. For most if not all of us, motivation is key to a life of living meaningfully. Life without motivation is worthless and empty.

When you just drifting and wandering around, with no sense of direction and purpose in life, you become more and more de-motivated, losing your inner self in time, become depressed. I have learned this from one of my close relative. He is very de-motivated and un inspired about his personal life.

Your personal or career goals largely determine the path that you wish to live your life. When wanting to live an abundant life, then the inspiration will easily be found in life stories of those who have achieved success. This principle is equally true to anything you want to pursue in your life be it politics or business. You can never get enough inspiration, it cannot be measured. I feel the starting point to success is inspiration. Again the question “what inspires you” comes to play. If you have not answered this question this is the time to do it.

Definitely, one needs to acquire understanding, to study and learn, to collect knowledge, and the skill to manage your time; however all this will be useless without motivation. And inspiration is a chief motivator and so is the craving to learn. The craving to learn is a very big motivator to me. These should  be your driving force to success. Success in an undertaking leads you to gaining more pursuit and a much greater yearning to learn, resulting in growth of motivation directed towards the goal that you have set. It is almost impossible to succeed without acquiring enough knowledge understanding in a given field. See article “knowledge is key to success”.

Enthusiasm springs from inspiration. Enthusiasm is one’s attitude of confidence, curiosity and expectation, with fragments of daring and risk. Let’s be realistic, for you to succeed you need to take certain risks. Imagine how life would be if there were no risks to be taken, then we would all be successful. The difference between people who are more successful and those who are not is that someone took risks and the other did not. Vince Lombardi says “the difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather in a lack of will”. Business men are people that have gone out there and have taken financial risks and have the will to continue. If you have a job like in my country, you feel safe that your employers will take care of some of your social obligations e.g. sickness and are almost guaranteed of a pay check at the end of the month. Whereas, if you are managing your own business you have to work for your pay check. You cannot afford to be wasteful on time.  More in part 2.

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Categories
Personal Development Self Growth

The five D’s of Success part 1

This is a 2 part series talking about the five D words of my life; Dreams; Desire; Diligence; Determination and Discipline. Life is not for the lazy our creator engineered us to live a very fulfilling and enjoyable life on this earth. He further gave us all the implements and apparatus needed for it. It is entirely up to us as individuals to tap into and know what those implements are. I personally do not believe that living an empty life is the desire of our creator no no it is an individual’s choice. If you are living a mediocre life it is the choice you have made. There are two things in life, either you make the correct choice or decision and live a very fulfilling and pleasant life or you make the wrong one and be on the other side of the good things, that’s entirely up to you. At the time am writing this article I know that am on my way to living a very fulfilling life and have come up with a guide I am living by.

It is very important that you derive yourself a set of standard to follow. I have a dream and that dream is to help change the future of most of the young people in my neighbour hood and society at large. To do this I will not give them money but help change the way they think about life and help them become what they want to be in life. Most of the people I have come across so far indicate that it is their thinking or rather their mind set that is a problem and nothing else. I want to be the change I want to see in the world before I can reach out to helping others. I have outlined below 5 very useful characteristics to help me achieve my goal.

Dreams

Remember I have a dream. This is what keeps me posting these blogs to help someone out there to change their thinking and perhaps their attitude towards life in general. Dreams are very important they are tenets of success. Whatever, you want to be in life starts with a dream. Am sure we all have dreams at least I have mine.? Dreams are your aspirations and therefore, it is very important to keep them alive. Write them down so that you can have a very clear idea of them and read them very often to keep them alive in your mind. There is power in writing down your aspirations. I mentioned about helping to change people’s minds and notice that dreams are made from our minds. We visualize them in our minds. You must dream big. Fill your mind with your dreams and begin living your dreams even when they are not yet, fully actualised. There is no successful person without a dream. It all starts with the mind.

Only those who become “success conscious” ever become very successful. Success conscious means that the mind has become so saturated with the desire for success, that one can even see themselves already successful. If you do not see great success in your imagination, you will never see it in reality. The world requires practical dreamers who can, and will put there dreams into action. Remember that practical dreamers do not quit even when they meet with temporary defeat. The greatest achievement was, at first, and for a time but a dream.

Remember that dreams are the seedlings of reality they are not born of indifference, laziness, or lack of ambition. Always keep your dreams alive and put them into action so that you do not rob the world of your gifts.

Desire

They say “desire” is the starting point of all achievement. People will see you in the days of your triumph, without investigating the cause of your success. Desire is the driving force to success. If the thing you desire to do is right, and you believe in it, go ahead and do it. Remember that all who succeed in life get off to a bad start, and pass through many challenges before they ?arrive?.? No one is ever defeated until defeat has been accepted as reality. Desire is a very strong emotion that is always transmuted into reality.

In life I have noticed that the things we desire most we usually accomplish. Ask yourself what you desire to be or achieve in life. Put the emotion of desire to work and you will see what results you can accomplish in your life. Desire causes us to think and behave in certain ways in order that we fulfill our desires. If you have a dream and plan turn them into a desire to achieve them. Desire backed by faith knows no such word as impossible. Remember that every adversity brings with it the seed of an equivalent advantage. You must realize that all who succeeded in life first did a certain amount of dreaming, hoping, wishing, DESIRING and PLANNING before they actually succeeded.

Continued in part 2

Remember always to “standout tall and be counted“.

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