Categories
Relationships

Building Strong Relationships and the Importance of Reciprocity

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants.” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” – Unkonwn

 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain.

 

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives.”  – Newell D. Hillis.

Reciprocity is the relation of mutual dependence or action or influence. Humans are well known for being social. Being in a relationship, be it intimate, social or business, requires the reciprocity of the people involved. All human beings excel in relationships where both parties have a balanced, give and take situation.

Relationships where reciprocity is not practiced are usually strained. They are one sided and are problematic. When there is no reciprocity the relationship is on the rocks.

To create reciprocity in a relationship, both parties need to take responsibility for that creation.

Good healthy relationships are those that people have mutual respect for one another and every member, does not feel that they are putting in much more than the other. If you want to live a happy life, it is important to be in a health relationship where reciprocity is practiced.

Some relationships are not beneficial for your personal development. If you are in a relationship that makes you uncomfortable, leave. Make the decision and set yourself free. You must weigh what benefits you are getting from being in certain relationships.

If you have to break them please go ahead. This year I have resolved to evaluate most of my relationships. I have also resolved to work on improving those that I feel need to be improved. Over the years I have slowly broken out of some unhealthy relationships.

I have managed to stay away from them, especially those that were not adding any value to my personal improvement. I liken relationships to the game of chess. If you play chess with players who are less skilled than you are, you do not improve. You are merely improving them whilst you remain stagnated.

Building and Understanding Reciprocity

The principle of reciprocity is also key and crucial to success in all business relationships. The strongest and longest lasting interpersonal relationships are based on the principle of reciprocity, and this extends far into the best relationships between buyers and sellers.

Therefore, it is important that we take time to build and understand this principle. You will agree with me that good solid relationships take time to build. When building them we must understand that every relationship is unique.

A good example of how to build the reciprocity in a relationship is to apply the principle of “do unto others what you would want them do unto you.” Believe me it is the best bet. If you expect people to treat you with respect you must be the first to respect them.

The flip side though is to do good and not expect anything in return. When you are expectant most of the times you will be disappointed because you are not in control of other peoples actions. You can only control your actions.

Here are a few ways that can help you build long lasting relationships:-

  • Be the First to Give Something – Try and be the first to give something. The bible says “it is more blessed to give than to receive.” When you give don’t expect anything in return. Regard it as a good gesture. If you are in business offer an incentive when the sale is complete. Send gifts to your clients as a way of thanking them for supporting your business.
  • Keep the Relationship Going – Good relationships are not easy to come by. We all want to have them, so keep the relationship going. Find ways that will help you grow it. I have noticed that some of the best relationships I have were built from my high school and college days. Yes, along the way I have built new ones but am more comfortable with my old buddies.
  • Offer to Support – Support is a form of giving. People always appreciate being supported. Do we all? I believe in a saying that “you never know who is going to keep you tomorrow.” Giving support is also a sign of generosity. Be generous.

You Need to Give and Take

In every relationship that you build you need to have a give and take attitude. You lose some and you win some. Relationships must be based on respect and mutual understandings. Good solid relationships are built on trust.

Remember that trust is earned. Once breached it takes time to repair. When you are trusted with a responsibility at work for example, ensure you deliver. If you cannot deliver ensure that you communicate. It is better to be honest, that way you earn trust.

Conclusion

To succeed we must build strong healthy and trust worthy, relationships with the people we come into contact with. “Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship” –
Buddha.

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Categories
Personal Development

Your Attitude and Self Application Determines Your Success

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants.” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” – Unkonwn

 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain.

 

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives.”  – Newell D. Hillis.

We all want to be successful. Don’t we? If you are an ambitious person, am confident that you are determined to achieve your success; that you are working round the clock to achieving your success. But being successful is not an easy fit. Because if it was, everyone one of us would have achieve our success.

The world would have been a totally different place than it is today. It would have been teeming with successful people. I can only imagine what it would have been like.

There are so many theories and formulas on how to become successful. Well,  I have not found an answer that is a one size fits all. However, reading and researching on the subject has helped me realise that there is no shot cut and substitute for hard work and self application.

Yes, you may have the desire; and that is very important; you may have the best tools at your disposal; but without the correct mental attitude and without taking action. Believe me you will not achieve your success. Why? because you will not have taken action. It is action which is very important.

To achieve your success, you need to have the right mental attitude; you need to apply yourself, because along the way you will be met with temporal setbacks. Things will not always go according to your expectations or plans. You will fall down and your attitude towards these temporal failures will largely determine how well you will achieve your success.

Your tenacity and willingness to learn from your mistakes; to know when to make adjustments; to take corrective measures where necessary will surely give you an advantage as you pursue your success. You will learn that to achieve your success you will need be a good leader of yourself. One who knows when to make drastic changes.

If you don’t apply your self you are certainly headed for failure. Sometimes, when we are faced with challenges, we always look for the easy way out. There are times I have felt like am dreaming and hope that when I wakeup, boom the problems would have disappeared.

But guess what, if you do not attend to the challenges you encounter they are surely doing more damage and will surface back to haunt you. I know for sure, that some challenges we face can be difficult to handle, but that does not mean you should turn a blind eye to them. Wakeup from your slumber and face them head on.

Keep Your Faith and Hopes Alive

The bible says “faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” When feeling frustrated because of your inability to achieve your goals, there is no need to lose faith and hope. Never lose your faith and hope when faced with frustrations.

Frustrations are a part of life. They are part of the learning process. It is very important to continue persisting and keep your faith and hopes alive. Focus on the bigger picture. Develop a mental attitude that will motivate you to achieve your goals.

The frustrations and challenges we go through are merely a way of building us up. They help prepare us to handle even bigger responsibilities. You should know that being successful comes with  responsibilities. The more successful you are, the more responsibilities you carry on your shoulders.

Keep in mind the joy, feeling and benefits that accrue with accomplishing your success. I know that it is not easy to keep focused when things are not going your way. But this is the time when we should exercise our faith and hope in God Almighty. The bible encourages us to put our plans in Gods hands. Believe me, he is faithful to those who are faithful to him.

One of the biggest mistakes people make is having faith without works. Yes it is good to have faith, but the bible says that “faith without works is dead.” Faith alone cannot save you. You need to take action on your faith to produce results. To achieve your success you need to take action on your faith.

How then do you develop this faith? Well, the bible says “faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God.” The preceding statement is very loud and clear. You cannot develop faith without hearing about it.

Now, with so many tools at our disposal we have no excuse to not have heard about the word of God. The bible is a source of inspiration for me. I encourage you to develop a habit of spending time reading and practising the word of God.

Do Not be Afraid of Your Failures

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives” so says Newell D. Hillis. “Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go” – William Feather.

If you want to be successful you should not be afraid of failing. Failure is synonymous with success. Those who have succeeded have failed before. The more you fail the greater the chance of success. Well you may not agree with all these statements.

But the truth of the matter is you will never succeed without failure. So you might as well get used to the fact that being afraid will only prolong or indeed deter your from your success. Get over with being afraid of the unknown.

It is time for you to put your plans to action; to begin to realise those dreams. The more you act on your plans the more fearless you become. Sometimes I feel fear is just a state of mind or rather laziness. Yes, laziness. I believe that it is better to die trying than not to try at all. “I failed my way to success” –
Thomas Edison.

Conclusion

How far you go in life is largely determined by how far you are willing to go. In other words you determine the level of your success by the actions you take. I found this article on how to increase your success chances very helpful check it out. Unit next time remember that “your action and and self application determines your success.”

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Categories
Happiness

Decide to Be Happy Everyday and Enjoy Your Life

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants.” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” – Unkonwn

 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain.

 

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives.”  – Newell D. Hillis.

There are two things to aim at in life: first to get what you want, and after that to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind has achieved the second” – Logan Pearshall Smith. Everyday is a beautiful day that is filled with joy and happiness, but also everyday is a beautiful day that is filled with sadness. If every day is a gift why do you then decide to live a life of sadness. We live our lives based off, the decisions we made in the past. That is why it is better to make the right decisions today that will affect our future.

Am not perfect but everyday that I wake-up, I thank God almighty for giving me another opportunity to better my life. I believe that for as long as you are alive you have the chance of improving your life and that of the people around you and beyond.

Yes, I know you may not be in a position to do the things you want to do now, but you have the chance because you are alive. One thing I have noticed is that we as human beings take life for granted. We do not take time to appreciate the fact that we are alive and in pretty much good health. If you are reading this article you are even more privileged than most people. It simply means that you have access to a computer and the internet.

However, you are accessing them, these things cost money. Do you know how many people cannot even come close to think about having the privilege you have? Yet you continue living a life of sadness. I know that you may not have all you desire, but at least give thanks that you are alive. Life is not just about having all you desire but living happily and enjoying it.

Take Responsibility for Your Decisions

The biggest weakness we have as human beings is not taking full responsibility for our decisions. We only want to take responsibility when things are going right and people are praising us. I believe that taking responsibility for our mistakes is a sign of maturity. I am proud to take full responsibility for my personal decisions. Sometimes its difficult to accept that am in a certain situation because of my decisions but that’s just the truth. If I had made better choices I could not have found my self in difficult circumstances in the first place. Ever since I decided to be taking full responsibility for my decisions, life is more fulfilling and enjoyable. What this has done is that, before I make a major decision I think about it very hard.

I have also learnt that deciding to be happy early in the morning makes my day a lot easier to navigate. I know that sometimes people want to mess it up for me, but because a decision was made in the morning to be happy, I stick with it. My mind is pre-conditioned to stay happy and this flows to my emotions. They say our thoughts influence our emotions. When you decide on something and you stick with it, nothing can shake you. Yes things may be thrown at you, but you have the resolve to be happy and you will be, even during the bad and difficult times.

One of the things I do when am confronted with a potentially explosive situation is to just smile and walk away if I can or better still just keep quiet. Its hard to just walk away at first especially if you are hot tempered, but with practice it becomes easier.

There is no need to allow people to annoy you. Life is too short to be lived sad. God has given us the ability to choose freely. The power to decide is entirely in your hands. I like to make a comparison with say going out to have fun with friends. Most of the time when something goes wrong we blame the company we were hanging around with for the decisions we made. Yes they may have played a part but the final say, lies in our hands. If you say no to taking part in unwanted situation you can. This also goes to being in a toxic relationship. You can either decide to continue in it or you can get out.

Learn to Enjoy Your Life

Life is too short, learn to enjoy it. You can only enjoy life if you decide to and this decision is entirely yours. There are many ways to enjoying life, one of which is to do the things that make you happy more often. Most of us do not enjoy our lives simply because of the jobs we do. If your daily job does not make you happy you are most likely living a sad life.

The happiest people are those with jobs that make them happy. You can be paid as much money as possible but without happiness the job is meaningless. You would be probably contributing more if you found a job that makes you happy. Now, a job does not necessarily mean being employed by someone or working for a big corporation. You could be self employed and earning a decent living by doing the things that make you happy. “Be absolutely determined to enjoy what you do” – Gerry Sikorski.

That is why it very important to know your life’s purpose earlier in your life. This helps in choosing careers that will enhance and help you achieve your goals. One of the ways to know what your life’s purpose is, is to list down the things that easily flow from you. The things that you do with much ease and less effort. These are the things that could point you to what your life’s purpose is. It could be that you are gifted at making people laugh, well go ahead and be a professional comedian. The idea is start living and enjoy your working life. After all we spend most of our time working.

If you have made mistakes in the past like me, don’t worry, there is still room for change. You can make the change right now and decide to do the right things for the rest of your life. And besides who has never made a mistake in their life? Forget the mistakes you made, treat them as a learning point and move on. You cannot change the past but can positively influence your future beginning this moment by making the right decisions.

Conclusion

You don’t pay the price for success. You enjoy the price for success” – Zig Ziglar. I would like to conclude by advising you to made a decision to start living a happy life. Get your power back by taking responsibility for your decisions. We all fall down, but we get up and press on with life. Until next time have a blessed and happy life.

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Categories
Inspiration Motivation Personal Development Self Improvement

Be open minded and flexible to change

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants.” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” – Unkonwn

 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain.

 

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives.”  – Newell D. Hillis.

We live in a society that is constantly evolving and therefore, it is important that we adapt to change in order that we enhance our personal development and growth. Change is inevitable especially with the continuous advancement of technology and information gathering. It is very unwise to have a rigid mind that does not easily accept change. Most of us are in this category. You should keep an open mind and focus on the things that will help you achieve your personal goals. Make sure that you make the change as and when necessary in the processes you are imploring to achieving your goals. However, stay focused on the ultimate goal. “It is not the strongest species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the most responsive to change” – Charles Dawin.

The best leaders are those that do realise when to make the change and implement it as and when necessary. In my journey for personal development and growth I have had to make lots of changes in the way I do things without compromising on my personal values and I always keep my focus on my goals. I keep an ear to the ground and am always willing to make the necessary adjustments to accommodate the ever changing environment. Flexibility does not mean you accept failure, it is just one way of doing things quicker and effectively. You will agree with me that a few years ago posting letters was done mainly through the post office where as now we are living in the advent of emails and other technological messaging systems. These have entailed that we drastically change the way we do business. Imagine if you remained behind and still just want to use the post office for sending mails to your clients as opposed to using the various platforms that are quicker. If you are into sales you will definitely be out of business.

Nearly everything has evolved over the last decade or so and it is therefore, inevitable that you have a flexible mind and change the way you conduct your daily business. Being a computer programmer myself who learnt programming in a language called COBOL in the early 90’s I know how much the computer industry had changed. In fact COBOL has been obsolete for a very long time now. If i did not move with time it would have been difficult for me to keep up with the industry. Some of you will agree with me that some of the things you learnt at school a few years ago are no longer applicable now. The key thing about change is that it can either be the better or for worse. You should always understand what the pros and cons are for a certain change before initiating it. Take time to learn and appreciate it.

Keep Learning and improving your skills

As a human beings it is very important that we are continuously learning and keep improving our skills if we are to be relevant to industry. I am always reading and learning new skills on a daily basis. My current target is to read 12 Books by 31st October 2019 as a way of improving my skill set this is on top of my other everyday readings. I will keep reviewing this on a quarterly basis and see how much progress am making. I also want my site to be one of the best personal development and self growth websites in the next five years. To achieve this I have set out to keep reading and learning new technics that will be of value to my readers. This means that for me to rank in the top bracket, the site will need to have very updates in terms of articles. Not just articles but good quality articles that are helpful. I have also noticed that its builds my confidence to talk about the subject of personal development.

Improving your skill set is one major way to improving your chances of achieving your personal goals with more pleasure and less pressure. I know for sure that in the coming months I will be more confident and motivated to write very meaningful articles. I am also currently learning article writing technics. Those of you who have been reading my articles will agree that there is a tremendous improvement with my articles. With the new skills being acquired I also intend to do a major face lift of the earlier articles and bring them up to the desired standard. These are some of the goals that I have set for this website.

I encourage you to take learning and improving your skill sets very seriously regardless of what you are involved in. The most successful people are constantly reading and learning new skills as this is the only way to keep them above the competition. If you are in sales for example it will do you good to learn how to spend more time with your customers who are more promising, so as to close your sales more quickly and efficiently. There are lots of ways you can increase your knowledge. You could either decide to go to school or have a deliberate habit of spending more time reading industry related materials. An investment in your knowledge and putting what you have learned to practice is a sure way of improving your skill set.

Be willing to pay the price

If your goal is a financial one make sure you set a clear price of what you will pay for what you want to earn. If you want to earn a certain amount of money say $5K every month ensure that you begin giving society the equivalent of $5K in value every month. In other words be willing to pay the price. Start with one or two streams of income and broaden them as you get comfortable with the current ones. Be very honest with your self and do not cut corners by doing illegal things. Having multiple streams of income is a very good safe guard as when one stream dries up due to various reasons, you will still have another one generating  income as needed. On this website my major source of income is google adsense. There are a few other affiliate programs that I recommend but currently google adsense seems to be doing much better than all of them. I intend to include more streams as time goes by and as the site starts to generate more traffic.

I am  also pretty sure that as the traffic increases the google ads will generate even more revenue than what is currently obtaining. I hope to publish the income figures in the future. Currently its really nothing to talk about. The encouraging thing is that if I can generate $1 per day then I think it is possible to generate $2, $3, $4 per day and so on. I just have to keep working hard, until I get the desired results before moving on to implement the other streams. I have noticed that those who are financial sound do not just have one source of income but they have learned to have multiple sources of income doing what they love most.

I believe that it takes time and effort to build something worthwhile, this am determined to achieve and very motivated to seeing it come to pass. Like I said in my earlier articles this website is just one way of my contribution to the world. It is my prayer that everyone who reads my articles at least gets inspired by them. I have so far written 99 articles averaging 1,000 words per article this is a whooping 99,000 words on this website, Wow.

Experiment with change

Human beings are always fearful of change and usually do not like it. Change always brings with it a lot of things and mostly we are reluctant to change for fear of failure. Remember failure is just an opportunity to do things differently. We must learn to embrace change and be able to adjust accordingly. It is also important to experiment with change and focus on the opportunities it brings along. We are always fearful to change especially when we think we do not have adequate knowledge and expertise to go along with it. Sometimes it is just that we are accustomed to doing things in a certain way and sudden need to change our habits is usually un comfortable. I know how frustrating it maybe. I have been their before.

What I have noticed so far is that change always requires us to learn new things and puts a challenge on our abilities. I guess life would have been very boring without change. In your daily endeavours I encourage you to experiment especially in the area of technology, before you fully implement the new one. This will give you a better understanding of the new changes and what is actually required and expected of you. At the rate we are going in the field of technology I am always one of the last people to jump on the new changes. I will be very honest with you I have never been a fun of microsoft windows 10. I find it very difficult to navigate through and always struggle when am using it. But I guess that at some point windows 7 & 8 will be obsolete and I will have to make the change.

As human beings we need to accept mistakes and make the necessary adjustments. Experimenting comes with a lot of mistakes and the only way we can quickly move on is to accept them. It does not help much to start pointing fingers on who is wrong and who is right but rather focus on correcting the mistake. This is true especially if you are in a leadership position. Besides the success or failure of a group is all credited to the leader. A good leader takes responsibility especially for the failures of a team, he will give credit to the team for its successes.

Conclusion

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference” – Serenity Prayer. You cannot stop the wind of change when it blows in your direction regardless of what you are doing. If you want to grow exponentially you need to learn how to embrace change and work to improve your skills. Remember that change always comes with various opportunities and you should always be on the look out to identifying and benefiting from them. A good leader always reads ahead of his followers and is quick to give direction in the advent of the ever changing environment.  I hope you will keep an open mind and be flexible to embracing change as the will help you to “standout tall and be counted”.

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Categories
Personal Development Self Growth Success

Goals and goal setting

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants.” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” – Unkonwn

 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain.

 

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives.”  – Newell D. Hillis.

In the absence of clearly defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily acts of trivia.” ~ Unknown. Goal setting is the one activity that sets apart achievers from those who are surviving or just getting by. By goal setting we are enabled to create the future we want to happen rather than live the future that others want to happen. Goal setting enables us to take greater charge of our daily lives.

In this article I outline some of the ways to help set reachable goals.

Strengths

You can base your goals on anything you want, although the chances of your success are significantly increased if firstly you base them on your strengths and secondly on your opportunities in the field your are currently under taking. It is very important to know your strengths and weakness before undertaking any goal setting venture as this will help you decide what naturally flows from within you.

Do some self research such as a personal SWOT, Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats. When conducting a personal research note the following:-

  • Your strengths are the things you are good at and enjoy doing. Using your strengths for goal setting will usually provide some sort of motivation as you go on.
  • Weaknesses are the things you have to do, but these are things you dislike or make slow progress at them.
  • Opportunities are the external circumstances you expect to arise, create or already exist and expect them to aid you moving towards your set goals.
  • Threats are those external circumstances that are very unlikely to help you move forward and would probably set you backwards.

Whilst we must keep on working to improve our weaknesses and keep a close eye on the threats it is very important that our goal setting should be based on our strengths and opportunities.

Keep your dreams alive

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt. The greatest achievement was, at first, and for a time, but a dream. You must realize that all who have achieved great success first did a certain amount of dreaming, hoping, wishing, DESIRING, and PLANNING before they succeeded.  You may as well know, also that every great leader, from the dawn of civilization down to the present, was and is, a dreamer. One of the factors that restrict many people from reaching their full potential is the belief that we should not aim for big dreams. Yet all evidence for most successful people is that they have kept their big dreams alive and have fully pursued them without giving up. It is very important to keep your dreams alive and to pursue them without giving up.

I have learnt to break down my dreams into smaller achievable goals and to always make changes that improve my chances of achieving them. Remember that big dreams come with greater responsibility and that “big goals attract big resources like a magnet”. Having dreams makes my life more interest to live. Yes sometimes days do not turn out as planned but what is life without challenges? I do not give up just because the day has not turned out as hoped for, but rather I focus on the positive things that come my way.

Abraham Lincoln dreamed of freedom for the black slaves, he kept his dream alive and put it into action, and barely missed living to see a united North and South translate his dream into reality. That is how important it is to keep your dreams alive and acting on them.

Write down your goals

The best way to keep your dreams alive is to write them down and read them every often to constantly remind you of the bigger picture. There is something different when you write down your dreams as opposed to just keeping them in your head. DO NOT depend on your memory alone. I have a note book that has all the dreams intend to achieve; this is like the blue print of my life. Written goals have a way of transforming wishes into wants, can’ts into cans, dreams into plans and plans into reality.

The act of writing clarifies your goals and helps you keep a record of your dreams and goals. Writing down your dreams acts as a commitment to your goals. This will eventually aid you when you are doing your daily goal setting activities as these will be tailored to the overall bigger picture. You can also add reasons to your written down goals so as to give you motivation and help check your progress on a regular basis. So don’t just think it INK IT. One of the best aid I have discovered is the habit of daily goal setting.

Pursuing your goals with passion and desire

The driving force behind your goal achievement is your passion and desire. You must desire your goals constantly, vividly and with a burning passion, knowing that you have already achieved them and are now working towards realising them. When you do, it is almost impossibly to fail at what you are aiming for. The importance of pursuing our goals with passion cannot be over emphasised that is, why it is most wise and very cardinal that we set our goals based on our strengths and what we enjoy doing. Napoleon Hill in his book Think and Grow Rich says that “when a man really DESIRES a thing so deeply that he is willing to stake his entire future on a single turn of the wheel in order to get it, he is sure to win”.

Conclusion

Goal setting is central to maximising and realising our potential because it enables us create something unique and new in our lives it also allows us to feed our goal oriented brain and puts us in control of our future. Set your goals as big as you can this will help challenge and stretch your capacity and ability. There are many ways that can be use to help with goal setting the above are just but some of the ways I have personally devised to help me in my endeavours. Remember to also build your goals around your strengths and the things that you enjoy doing. “standout tall and be counted”.

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Categories
Carnival

Personal success and development carnival – First edition

Welcome to the First edition of Personal success and development carnival. I hope to create this as a source for linking you to some great articles across the blog-sphere. Personal development is essential for us all to help change the world for the better. It is my prayer and hope that you will find these listings helpful, uplifting and motivating. Do not just stop at reading them share them and act on them. Hope to see you soon. If you are interested in having your post included in an upcoming edition of the carnival, please follow this link.

Patricia Pugliese presents Are you a Caregiving Couple? posted at The Caregiving Cornerstone, saying, “As a couple, who may be in the midst of caring for parents or other loved ones, please don’t forget to take care of yourselves. Think of the reasons you want to keep your love alive, the little things you did for each other when you were in Amorata. Loosely, amorata, refers to the birth of romance and love.”

Personal development
Tim presents How to Overcome Email Addiction posted at Fitness for Professionals, saying, “Email addiction is a problem a lot of people struggle with. Use these tips to help you overcome your email addiction.”

Sebastian presents What is Self-Confidence? posted at Seduction Blog, saying, “You need it to put the art of seduction into practice and to become successful with women. This is a fact you just can’t ignore. Fair enough, but how do you get this crucial ability, how do you reach this state? How do you become a self-confident man?”

Erik Matlock presents Missed opportunities posted at Becoming a better man, saying “Start watching for opportunities to be a good man. Listen and hear. Make them know you are all there. Love them”.

Positive thinking and Success
MandyKloppers presents Learned Optimism  posted at Thoughts on Life and Love, saying “Learned optimism is the idea in positive psychology that a penchant for joy and optimism can be cultivated. It is contrasted with learned helplessness. Learning optimism is done by consciously challenging any negative self-talk”.

Jon Rhodes presents How to Beat Your Winter Blues posted at HypnoBusters, saying, “The winter period, particularly after Christmas, can see many people feeling sad and lethargic. Here’s some practical tips to energise and make you feel happy once more.”

That concludes this edition. Submit your blog articles to the next edition of personal success and development carnival using our carnival submission form. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.

Categories
Inspiration Motivation Motivational Personal Development

Inspiring and empowering others to help you

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants.” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” – Unkonwn

 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain.

 

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives.”  – Newell D. Hillis.

“For changes to be of any true value, they’ve got to be lasting and consistent.” ~Tony Robins.  “Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives” ~ Tony Robins. No man is an island. Personal success and development cannot be achieved in isolation. God has abundantly blessed us with people in our lives that we can rightly use to achieve our life’s purpose and goals.

Each and every person you have come across in your life has a part to play and it is entirely up to you to recognise that and help them to help you move closer to your life’s purpose. In this article I discuss three important ways to empower our associates. Firstly let me make mention that there are 3 groups of people in our lives; firstly those close relations, these will include your family, your friends, your spouse and children; secondly your work relationships, these will include your colleagues, work mates including your boss. Thirdly all the other people you come across on a day to day basis.

You need to know how to interact these people in order for you to help you achieve your desired life’s purpose and goals. The key areas I have identified are listed below.

APPRECIATION
There is no single person I have come across in my entire life that does not like or rather feel good when they are appreciated. This is perhaps the most important aspect of getting people to like you and do what you would like them to do. You must learn and be in the habit of thanking people even for the smallest of things they have done for you. A simple smile and a “thank you” goes a long way in lifting the other persons morale.

At least say thank you for the effort even when what you have been given is not exactly what you asked for. Let the other person feel appreciated when serving you. Appreciation lifts the self-esteem of human beings. The feeling of appreciation is an intense one and can make or break someone’s self-esteem. Imagine yourself working for a boss who does not seem to appreciate whatever effort you put in your work.

Imagine the feeling of not being appreciated after you have spent so many hours on an assignment. But then contrast this with the feeling of being appreciated even for your very small efforts. You will even put in more extra time because you feel that your work and presence are being appreciated.

APPROVAL
Remember, everyone is primarily emotional.  Everything that people do, or refrain from doing, is triggered by their deeper emotions.  Your job is to connect with their higher and more positive emotions so they feel so good about you they want to help you and please you in some way. If you are in a supervisory position it will really help you to spend more time with your subordinates inviting their feedback and comments on their work. This I believe is one of the best methods to get their work approved as they will understand what is expected of them.

Nothing beats the feeling of satisfaction when your work is approved by your manager. You feel like the work is personally yours. Believe me having a highly, motivated worker can yield results beyond your imagination. If your personal goal is very dependent on other people’s input you need to devise methods that are consistent and gain respect from other people. You need to be nice, friendly and courteous. I encourage you to read more on people management. In life, you always have a choice.  You can either do everything yourself or you can get others to help you do some of the work.

ATTENTION
The third and final aspect of empowering others is attention. Just like every one of us love attention in one way or the other. Learn to listen with a keen interest. Pay attention to the details that keep people motivated and work to improve them. If you have a difference with say a work colleague. Do not argue with them but reason with them. Listen to their explanation and make sure you understand the reasoning behind.

I have experienced this especially with women. Even when they know that you cannot help them but just the fact that you will listen to them makes a difference. The fact that you will give them the attention they need, will greatly improve their self-esteem. If you are married that is lesson number one for you.

CONCLUSION
Your ability to delegate effectively, which requires that you inspire and empower others to help you willingly, will determine how fast you move ahead.  It will determine how much you earn in your job. It will determine the quality and quantity of your productivity.  It will determine your ultimate financial success in life.  And the key to all of this is your ability to empower others. Remember to always “standout tall and be counted”.

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Categories
Mental Health Personal Development Success

The secret and source of power

The possibilities of thought training are infinite, its consequence eternal, and yet few take the pains to direct their thinking into channels that will do them good, but instead leave all to chance” ~ Marden. Before we go further lets define the word power “the ability to do something or act in a particular way, especially as a faculty or quality”. We are all embedded with the ability and quality to do something. You and I have been equipped with the power to do something be it good or bad. No one on this earth can claim to have no ability to do anything you have the ability.

Since all human beings have the ability and quality to do something one would then expect all of us to lead very successful and fulfilling lives. However, this is not to be, the difference lies in knowing the secret of power and the source of it; the use and application of this power; the realization of power. In this article I try and outline the secret and source of power.

The source of power

The question to ask then is what is the source of this power? You will get the idea of the source of power as you go along reading. I now understand that the mind and the attitude of it are the most important elements of success and personal development. What your mind thinks is what you eventually become. In other words you are in your current position because of the thoughts you entertained.

The thoughts you harbour in your mind are key to your success. If you want to make lots money, have the money consciousness. The ability to eliminate imperfect conditions depends upon mental action, and mental action depends upon consciousness of power; therefore, the more conscious we become of our unity with the source of all power, the greater will be our power to control and master every condition.

This mental attitude is our personality and is composed of the thoughts which we have been creating in our own mind; therefore, if we wish a change in conditions all that is necessary is to change our thought; this will in turn change our mental attitude, which will in turn change our personality, which will in turn change the persons, things and conditions, or, the experiences with which we meet in life. This however, is no easy matter, but with persistent effort it may be accomplished.

The source of all this power is the universal mind, from which all things proceed and which is one and invisible.

The secret of power

Well you have known the source of power the next step is to learn the secret of power. You may know the source but now you need to learn how to harness it. Like I always say knowledge without action is useless. You need to be conscious of power, because whatever we become conscious of is invariably manifested in the objective world; it is brought forth into tangible expression. Put simply your thoughts are transmuted into reality. Have you ever realized that even the earth was first a thought according to the bible? “In the beginning GOD created the heavens and the earth”. Correct me if I am wrong but, I believe that GOD thought and visualized what the earth would like be before creating it.

The secret of power is in the consciousness of it. The secret of success is one of the methods of organizing victory, one of the accomplishments of the Master-Mind. He thinks big thoughts and the creative energies of mind find no more difficulty in handling large situations, than small ones. Mind is just as much present in the infinitely large as in the infinitely small.

Conclusion

This is probably one of the most difficult topics I have written this far. I can only hope and pray that I have answered some of your questions and motivated you read even more. There is more stuff to read on this blog and I would encourage you to browse what topics may interest you. Bye for now remember to “standout tall and counted”.

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Categories
Mental Health Personal Development Self Growth

You are gifted and talented

“When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice” ~ Indian Proverb. “We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give” ~ Sir Winston Churchill. Each one of us is uniquely designed and made. We are all designed to be interdependent. In this article I want to remind and encourage you of how important and relevant you are to humanity. I want you to realize that you have something to contribute towards the wellbeing of humanity.

I have noted with great concern on some of the negative questions being asked on one of the major websites. And to make matters worse they are coming from kids as young as 15 years of age. Most of the questions are to do with giving up on life. Imagine a 15 year old kid is giving up on life even before he actually begins. I always ask myself this question; imagine Albert Einstein; Henry Ford; Thomas A. Edison and the many other inventers and discoverers had given up on their lives, what would the world be today?

Your gifts and talents may not amount or march the great discoverers and inventors of the past, but it plays a very significant role in the advancement of humanity. You have a very significant and important role to play on earth. Myles Monroe says the richest place on earth is the grave yard. This is where you find inventions that were not invented; dreams that where not realized; songs that were not sung; buildings that were not built and many other things that the world has been deprived of.

Ask not what the world will do for you but, what you will do for the world. Stop thinking from within the box and in fact let’s remove the box all together. The human race is like a body. The body cannot function properly with a missing part, don’t be those missing parts. Do not rob the world of your talents and gifts. Do not deprive us of your contribution to humanity. We need it greatly. You are not living by accident but for a reason and purpose.

If you were almost giving up on life sit down and thank your God that you are still alive. There are so many things to thank your creator about and let alone obey his words by contributing to the well being of humanity. I personally have learnt that there is no little contribution. It all adds up to something. It is high time you started using your mind constructively.

You see everything is conceived in the mind. Our minds are the workshops for all that we see. The real secret of power is consciousness of power. The more conscious we become of our unity with this mind, the less conscious we shall become of conditions and limitations, and as we become emancipated or freed from conditions we come into a realization of the unconditional. We have become free! We have removed the box. We have evolved.

The ability to eliminate imperfect conditions depends upon mental action, and mental action depends upon consciousness of power; therefore, the more conscious we become of our unity with the source of all power, the greater will be our power to control and master every condition.

Conclusion

Every human being including yourself is as important as the next one and the one before. I want to encourage you not to look down upon yourself. You were created to contribute to humanity and your contribution is valuable. This all starts with you realizing and appreciating how important you are to the whole world. DO NOT rob us of your gifts and talents. Just like you have benefited from the inventors of computers we also want to benefit from you. Remember to always “standout tall and be counted”.

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Mental Health Motivational Personal Development Self Growth

4 Tips for inspirational and motivational thoughts

Motivational Quotes

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” – Anatole France.

 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Serenity Prayer

 

Cease to ask what the morrow will bring forth, and set down as gain each day that Fortune grants.” – Horace.

 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called present.” – Unkonwn

 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain.

 

“Failure is blindness to the strategic element in events; success is readiness for instant action when the opportune moment arrives.”  – Newell D. Hillis.

The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be” ~ Horace Bushnell. One of the keys to being able to maintain the motivation levels for any project is found in the ability to stay positive no matter what the circumstances are. Having a positive mindset is not only an asset to any endeavor but also to the individual as people generally like being around positive minded people.

There are several ways to learn how to stay within a positive mindset always. Below are just some simple recommendations anyone can follow to have positive thoughts:

The mind
Perhaps the first recommendation would be to start with the focus of the mind at any given time. Our mind is key to staying motivated and inspired. Training the mind to only recognize the positive elements in any situation or circumstance is one good habit to follow. This is because the perception formed in the mind generally dictates the rest of the individual’s response. Therefore if the mind is able to process information in a positive manner then there is a better chance of facing any potential problems successfully. See related articles the power of thought and knowledge is key to success.

Motivation is from within. “When you begin to perceive that the essence of the Universal is within yourself; is you; you begin to do things; you begin to feel your power; it is the fuel which fires the imagination; which lights the torch of inspiration; which gives vitality to thought; which enables you to connect with all the invisible forces of the Universe. It is this power which will enable you to plan fearlessly, to execute masterfully” ~ The master key.

Company
Being in the company of other positive minded people also helps to ensure the cultivation of the individual’s own positive mindset. Keeping negative people from being a permanent fixture within one’s everyday activities would be a step in the right direction. You must be mind of the people you surround yourself with. I believe that all people we meet with have a bearing and a purpose in our lives. Not all of them are beneficial though.

Try and evaluate all your mates and companions and see what each one of them adds to your life. I can tell you for myself I know amongst my peers who to approach when I am in need of assistance in a certain area say financial; spiritual etc. At least I have an idea of the characters of some of my friends and those I normally associate with and I know what I draw from their lives.

Knowledge
Nothing can substitute knowledge and this comes through hearing and by reading. Another interesting way of staying positive is to surround one’s self with positive posters, quotes, audio and visual media exposure and maybe even trying to commit to memory some helpful and positive abstracts or statements. Attending personal development; self growth workshops and or seminars is another good way to staying motivated.

I have made it a point to read at least one new motivational book every month. This is besides my daily reading of the bible. I can attest that the bible is probably the best book on motivation and inspiration. You can never go wrong reading the bible. Staying motivated also requires that you read books that motivate you at least once a day for thirty minutes.

Exercise
Proven scientific research has shown that regular exercise can also help regulate the chemical balance in the human body and thus create the positive energy that is needed to keep a positive mindset. Thus following a regular exercise routine would be a definite advantage. Meditating and yoga may also help to achieve the same positive mindset as it is predominantly geared towards this end.

There are also some mind exercises and games that help grow your minds. I personally play chess besides a weekly physical exercise schedule. I prefer to do my physical exercise in the early hours of the day. This makes me feel very refreshed as I go about doing my daily business.

Conclusion
Inspiration and motivation is the art of imbibing, the art of self-realization; the art of adjusting the individual mind to that of the Universal Mind; the art of attaching the proper mechanism to the source of all power; the art of differentiating the formless into form; the art of becoming a channel for the flow of Infinite Wisdom; the art of visualizing perfection; the art of realizing the omnipresence of Omnipotence. “Opportunity follows perception, action follows inspiration, growth follows knowledge, eminence flows progress. Always the spiritual first, then the transformation into the infinite
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and illimitable possibilities of achievement.” ~
the master key. Stay motivated and inspired “standout tall and be counted”.

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